The Sports Bizzo

By Toph…

I have to clear something up real quick. It’s not that I became a huge Pistons - Spurs fan. Despite what I wrote (Boring Could Be Better), I’m not kidding myself that Lakers - Celtics is the dream NBA Finals match up. I know that there’s apparently “history” between the two teams. They’ve only faced each other, what, 10 times in the NBA Finals? Plus, everyone is going to watch, which is good for the league. My point in the whole “I-want-Spurs-Pistons” was that if the Mavs, who I’ll support till it kills me, needed the Spurs and/or the Pistons to make it the Finals. This way they’re new style of ball, half-court offense/hard-nose defense made sense to continue. But, I can still accept it, because the Spurs did knock out both the Suns and Hornets. And, if you think the Spurs facing the Suns, Hornets and Lakers consecutively didn’t have a major effect on them, then you’re kidding yourself. Also, I have other, more personal, reasons for rooting for the Pistons. My boss hails from Motor City, and when the Pistons, Red Wings or Lions lose, I lose (he’s an A’s fan oddly enough, so the Tigers are exempt).

But, enough of my incessant complaining. No one is more excited than me to see the Lakers go head to head against the Celtics. Why? Because I can’t wait to see another Boston team lose on the most important stage.

P.S. I hate Boston. I do, I hate everything about them. OK, so it’s not the city’s fault that their fans are about as ridiculous as it gets. Actually, I apologize to their fans, because technically I’m not sure I’ve ever met a real one. And, the one who might be the greatest Boston sports fan, Bill Simmons, I admire in sexy/manly way. The Boston fans I hate are the ones who have popped up all around me. I have a hard believing that there are this many people from Boston living in San Francisco and Dallas. I do, because I know for a fact that it isn’t true.

I, also, have a sad confession to make. Maybe this will give you a little bit more background into why I am so bitter, or why I am so shallow. I don’t know, but here it goes. My wife is a Boston fan. More a fan of the Red Sox, which I hate will all my being, but still a Boston fan. Why? Well, I give her some credit, because she’s actually been to Boston, and a handful of games, as well as having family there. So, she at least has some right to be a Boston fan. She even came this close to moving there. But, all these random, no ties to the teams, Patriots, Red Sox and Celtics fans can suck it. Hey, where are all the Bruin fans? Oh, that’s right, they’re not winning. Why would anyone root for them? Unless of course you’re actually from Boston, but, again, I’ve never met anyone who is.

That is why I’m excited for a Boston - LA finals. Because I’ll be shocked if this year’s Finals goes 5 games. The Lakers will own the Celtics; Kobe will own the Celtics. Look, the Lakers are just better than the Celtics. Rondo won’t stand a chance against Fisher and Farmar, and Sasha and Jesus Shuttlesworth are about even. Plus, you have Lamar Odem and Vladimir, who the Celtics can’t match up with. But, most importantly, Paul Pierce can’t hold Kobe, and KG can’t hold Gasol. It’s not possible.

We all KG isn’t what he’s billed to be. In the biggest game of the year, a closeout game on the other team’s home court he scored 16 and pulled down 6 rebounds. This was a guy who was considered an MVP hopeful? Granted, Gasol only had 10 in their final game, but he pulled 16 rebounds (not to mention the 5 assists and 4 blocks). This is against Tim Duncan, arguably the greatest center to ever play the game.

I just can’t see how the Celtics can take the series. Then again, I just love it when Boston teams fail. I could be biased.