The Sports Bizzo

By Toph…

In no way do I think my fantasy team was a number 1 team, but still, to lose by 2 yards on a Monday night game that went into overtime? Come on! Yeah, that was what I dealt with this week. Welcome to Loserville. Population: Toph. Locked in a 90 - 90 tie (with bench points determining tie breakers), all I needed was 10 yards out of Heath Miller. He gave me 8, and I came up 2 yards shy of a victory I desperately needed. Really, Heath Miller? You couldn’t stretch your 2 catches into 2 more yards? The worst part of all was that the game went into overtime. What this means is that Heath Miller had additional minutes to gain 2 fucking yards and couldn’t do it. Suck it, Heath. Suck it hard.

After drying up my tears (and rage), I realized that football is a game of inches (well, yards in my case). Just ask Sam Hurd, who let the onside kick against Washington slip through his fingers. Granted, the Cowboys had no business winning that game anyways. It was an abysmal day all around. Trying to be optimistic, which for me is difficult, I’m thinking now is as good as a time as any to lose. The Cowboys have little competition these next 3 weeks and can put together easy wins against the Bengals, Cardinals and Rams. Of course, a loss against one of those teams, and things get scary in Dallas. I’m talking TO - McNabb scary.

We’re already hearing word that TO is bitching about the offense, but I don’t blame him (yet). It actually shocks me that more people aren’t bitching. They lost against the friggin’ Redskins for christsakes. Really? You can’t beat the Redskins at home? You couldn’t run on a team that missing Jason Taylor? Here’s an idea, Romo, throw the ball to TO more. Never mind the fact that he was double coverage all day. He’s TO. He can do everything. Let’s ignore that Crayton, Witten and Austin were playing like they wanted to win the game. You know, catching balls and gaining yards. Yeah, that’s unimportant when TO is around. Let’s keep throwing him the ball. Good idea, cocksuckers. It worked well.

Wow… what just happened? Sorry about that.

Let’s look at what I said last week!

The Redskins aren’t as bad as everyone thinks. They have a chance to push the Cowboys, and make this a close game. If they can, then they have a solid shot of winning this game. We’ve yet to see the Cowboys in the real pressure situation, and, for the sake of viewing, I hope they do keep it close. It makes Final Final a lot more fun.

Well, Final Final was more fun, despite the outcome. Actually, Ryan and I ended up talking shit to this guy all day. I’m still shocked we didn’t get into a fight. It went deeper than “your team sucks” stuff, too. Combining everything we said, we basically called the guy a gay fatass with disgusting teeth. Ah, football…

Let’s shift this discussion to college.

I know I don’t usually discuss college football, but when the top teams from professional and college go down it should at least be mentioned. USC fell into the same type of game as the Cowboys. They played poorly at the start, and decided to turn it on too late. They also lost to a team that had no business being on the field with them.

Here’s the difference, though, I hate USC. I’m on the Cal bandwagon (thanks to them paying the other half of my household income, and having no real university ties), so USC losing makes me happy. I will give them some credit, though. Their ladies are second to few…