(Editor’s note: You should watch this, if you haven’t heard the glory – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dldyuDZAQLQ)
By Christian…
Rappers like to talk about how it’s nice to have a gal who is demure and presentable in public, and then absolutely nuts in the sack. It’s the best of both worlds.
But what about if you have a lady that doesn’t know how to keep the two worlds separate?
What if your girl is a little too prissy in the bedroom? Worse yet, what if your lady’s a little too crazy in public?
Well hello there, Michelle Larcher de Brito.
De Brito has been causing a stir around the women’s tennis community because, well, after every ball she hits she makes a noise that sounds like she’s power fucking it. It sounds kinda like what you would imagine Jenna Jameson’s finishing move would sound like if she were a Mortal Kombat character.
Of course, de Brito’s opponents don’t like it much. And tennis is a pretty snobby sport to begin with, so you know those old farts don’t like some little tart like this coming in and sexing it all up. How dare she? Women’s tennis is a game of masculine lesbians, not hot little Portugese babes coming in and turning us all on with their guttural ejaculations, dammit!
Well, Michelle, from the rest of the non-homosexual tennis viewing populace, I’d like to thank you for being so vociferous. Every time you smack a forehand and follow it with a noise that makes me think you just broke my penis in half, I wonder how I got through all those years of watching tennis before you.
Sure, we had Monica Seles. But she was kinda dike-y and then went and got herself stabbed and shit. No one likes that.
You, my little Portuguese firecracker, make my loins light up like a Christmas tree when I watch you pulverize balls and scream out in ecstatic victory over them. And I just wanted to say thank you.
Now if you and Daniela Hantuchova could find a way to make it happen with each other, and maybe slip a little Mary Pierce in there to boot? You’d win my heart, you would.
4 Comments, Comment or Ping
Mus Lopil
What interesting article, but where took information?
Jun 2nd, 2009
Toph
yoda?
Jun 4th, 2009
yoda
bizzo on your face streaming…clean it you must…
Jun 4th, 2009
Christian
I didn’t even know there was any actual information in here, Mus. And you’re missing a preposition at the end of that question.
Jun 5th, 2009
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