The Sports Bizzo

By Toph…

I got a text from Christian the other night that asked if I was even watching the ALCS.

It’s well chronicled that have I loved the Yankees since I was a kid, despite growing up in Mesquite, Texas. I’ve always rooted for them, though it has mostly been a silent rooting, since it’s definitely not cool to be a Yankees fan.

I even came out of the Yankees closet to a few friends, and I slightly enjoyed the ribbing I received for it. I was ok with the Yankees spending ridic money on guys, and basically buying World Series victories in the late 90s. And, like a true Yankees fan, I was also very critical when other teams did the same thing, saying things like, “Ugh, the Marlins paid for that Series, then completely dismantled the team a year later.”

It wasn’t till this year that I truly got mad about Yankees buying their team. I was pretty hurt to see Giambi and Moose go in Free Agency. I was not pleased when they traded for Swisher, because I hated him in Oakland. I was pleased, however, in a wow-I-can’t-believe-that-just-happened kind of way when they brought in C.C. and A.J. Granted, it bothered me a little that the top of rotation was going to be these guys instead of Joba and Phil Hughes (the “future” of the Yankees).

But, it wasn’t till they signed Mark Fucking Teixiera that I had just had it with this team.

Mark Fucking Teixiera.

Hate.

Him.

Mark Teixiera. Ugh. I still hate him despite how well he’s doing this postseason. And, I’m not going to lie, even though I should be rooting against A-Rod, too, I’m happy for him. Maybe I’ll change my tune about Teix (I refuse to call him Tex, that assmonger) in a few years. God, I hope I don’t. I fucking hate him.

So, yes, Christian, I am watching the Yankees beat the Angels into submission, and I’m smiling while doing it. If they win the World Series this year, again, I’ll be watching. I’ll even be happy. But, I won’t tell anyone how happy I am. And that I have an erection for Jeets.