The Sports Bizzo

I mean, we are a sports blog, and we’re supposed to write about sports, right? It really only seems logical that we’d talk about the Super Bowl. Who’s even playing this year? Oh, come on now, you don’t think I know who’s playing? I threw a party when the Saints beat the Favre’s. Sometimes, but pure accident, I call Diabla “Manning” in bed. Pretty sure this is going to be one of the most exciting Super Bowls we’ve seen in a long effin’ time.

The problem I’m having here is that I don’t care who wins. I mean, I do, but I actually like both of these teams. Like is a strong word, maybe respect is better. Do I want the Saints to win so that the city of New Orleans is somehow finally saved from Katrina? Yes. Do I want Manning to become the greatest QB to ever live, just so he might appear on Saturday Night Live again? Yes.

It’s a win win for everyone here. Plus, if the Colts do win, then we finally get to push Joe Montana aside, and say that Peyton Manning is hands down the best. The guy is throwing to Pierre Garcon and Austin Collie (and, some dude named Dallas). He has a nonexistent running game (trust me, I had Addai on my fantasy team), and really doesn’t have a head coach. That’s some impressive shit right there.

The Saints, on the other hand, have “all the components.” Amazing offense, decent defense, Kim Kardashian and great coaching. There is also that small the-whole-nation-besides-Indy-people-are-rooting-for-you thing. Can you beat a team when the entire free world is rooting against you? I just wish this wasn’t the Colts playing on Sunday. Wouldn’t it be a little more fitting if the Pats were playing against the Saints? How easy would it be to root against the Pats? The issue is that I just can’t root against either of these teams. If they were playing the Cowboys? Definitely.

But, shit, they’re both so likable. So what does the rest of us do? (Rest us being non-New Orleans/Indianapolis residents) Well, we eat a shitton of food, watch an amazing game and hope for a lot of cheerleader shots.

My useless prediction? Saints 24 – Colts 21 (The pride of Southlake and my fantasy draft, Garrett Hartley, wins it again for the Saints. Shortly after the Super Bowl he becomes the official spokesperson for Adderall.)